Behind every great man is a woman

Funny Quotes

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

- Jim Carrey

There is a great woman behind every idiot

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As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.

- John Lennon

Happiness is like peeing in your pants

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Happiness is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the warmth.

The quickest way to double your money

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"The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket."

- Will Rogers

The problem with the world is that

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“The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts while the stupid ones are full of confidence.”

~ Charles Bukowski

Laughter is the best medicine unless

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Laughter is the best medicine unless you're laughing for no reason then you need medicine.

It's harder if you're stupid

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Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid.

- John Wayne

I hate two faced people

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I hate two faced people. It's so hard to decide which face to slap first.

I hate math but I love

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I hate math but I love counting my money!

A successful man is one who makes more money

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A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

- Lana Turner

A committee is a group that keeps minutes

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A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.

- Milton Berle